Limbo - a forced gift of Savasana
It's funny how being in Limbo can throw a control person (like myself...I know quite a shocking revelation -LOL) ) into reflection mode. When you don't have the known to control, then you can't control what you don't know. You are forced to take a step back, and examine those areas in your life that need to be examined.
This Limbo time (as I will call it) - really is a gift to those of us caught in the control mode. It forces us to stop planning everything and be present. To withdraw from the external world and go inward - kind of like Savasana at the end of Yoga class. Surrender to what it. And just like Savasana at the end of asana practice it is not easy to shut the mind off and go inward..
When I find myself without purpose (controlling things that need to be controlled, scheduled, planned) I kind of find myself not knowing what to do (the refrigerator beckons all too often). I feel like a boat out on the ocean just floating - no clear direction. Not necessarily stranded, but unsure what the next navigation is. But then I realize that floating for a while is OK. I just have to stop judging myself because I'm not on some mission to get something done (kind of like in Savasana when my mind won't shut off) . But find a way to enjoy this Limbo/Savasana time and the next course navigation will come.
For those of you control persons who just need to know what is going on (tehe)- here is what I do know:
- No surgery date is set yet
- CAT scan and Ultrasound scheduled for June 11th
- Waiting on the referral for the 3rd opinion for Dr. Matta in LA (he is a hip and Pelvis reconstruction specialist)
- Securing an Attorney to represent me in a personal injury/defective medical device suit
- Keeping the studio open at least through the month of June
- Aleve works better on hip pain than Advil
- the kind words of family and friends sometimes make you cry but are the best things in the world when you are down. :)